Here is what I made this week:
It is Baked Salmon with a buttery cilantro and lemon glaze. It was very good and I was quite nervous about cooking fish as I had never done it before. I only had two guests because of the aforementioned unreturned phone call which was good because fish is somewhat expensive. But I think the cost of these dinners is something I can live with, but I may cut back to twice a month sometime. We'll see.
So I thought I would share how I feel my Drawing Dinners are going. They are going alright. I love making the new meal every week and my pallette (I'm not sure how to spell this, and I don't think this is right but i don't feel like going to dictionary.com to check) has grown immensely. Awesome discoveries are that I like spinach and roasted bell peppers. My spice collection is growing which is cool, but also a little tedious to have to buy a whole bottle when who knows if I'll ever need cumin again. I love it when people tell me they are going to come and are even seem excited, either a. for the free meal or b. the fantabulousness of the drawing dinner has proceeded me or c. both a and b. I love that I have my own place settings and napkins (thanks Carrie and Melanie). I love my new apron (Thanks Alyson!) that I try to remember to wear when I am cooking but I'm not normally an apron wearer so this is a habit I am building. I do so by having a Drawing Dinner bag that I get out as I prepare my meals which carries my place settings and apron. I love when the conversation is flowing and I get to meet new people and others get to interact with new people. I love all the friends that I am making and spending time with my already good friends.
Here are things that I do not love, which doesn't mean that I hate but just adds stress or anxiety, or annoyance to the occasion. People that are late. I realize that things come up but if so then please call, then most likely I can forgive you and the rest of us can start without you. It mainly bugs me because the meal starts to get cold and then doesn't taste the best that it could be. I have since made up for this by starting to cook later then normal so that the meal won't be ready until about ten minutes after I have told my guests dinner will start. However, once I put this into effect people have been on time and sometimes early so they see me struggling to get everything done and ready.
Grocery shopping is really annoying to me, especially when I am looking for particular things. I'm starting to get a little better at it but there have been times where I went up and down every aisle and could not find something until I finally gave up. (why would Walmart not carry frozen mozzarella sticks!) Also, and this is my own fault I leave the shopping to the last minute sometimes which then stresses me out as I am running around gathering up ingredients.
When people don't return your phone call when you have left a message inviting them to dinner. If you're busy then that's fine but freaking call me back and let me know so I can invite someone else in time. Jeez!
I have never been that great at taking compliments accept from myself (but those are really rare). But the constant thank you's and your welcomes get a bit too much. I probably say thank you and your welcome like fifteen times in a night to the same compliment. I'm happy that people are liking what I cook and that they tell me so, but when is the stopping point? I think one person should say it for the group and everyone nods their head in agreement and I give a warm and heartfelt "Well you are all welcome and thank you all so much for coming" But it doesn't end there, I find the constant need to say thanks for coming which prompts well thank you for the dinner. "your welcome." "your welcome"
When people ask if they can bring anything, I have no response to that. I basically get all stressed out because of course I would love for someone to take some of the load off my shoulders but what would be the appropriate thing to say. What would be too greedy? A side dish? I usually think someone expects me to say a salad so that is what I ultimately do. What is easier than a salad. But I might get a little more forceful in the future. Dessert! (Alyson, did bring dessert once but I felt more comfortable asking her too. And actually she offered.) I have never really done the whole "Can I bring anything" when asked to a dinner. It is a complete afterthought. But I guess that shouldn't matter. One guy who came last week called the night of and asked if he could bring anything. I said no. I'm a little sexist when it comes to this too. I don't trust guys to follow through on bringing something and then if they don't where am I left? Without a salad to bring the whole meal together. Though I think this guy would have followed through.
The last thing is the stress of it all. Worrying that my meal won't turn out because I've never cooked it before. Running out of time. What will we talk about? Am I being a good hostess? There's a lull in conversation, they're bored. Am I doing this for the right reasons, which is to get people to see more of me and get to know me better and make more friends (coming out from a under a shadow that I put self under)? How do I transition between the meal and dessert smoothly. Why doesn't anyone want seconds on dessert when I totally do?
Does it sound like there is more that I don't like about doing these dinners than I do? Well, I still do like doing the dinners. These are little things that I can overcome or just deal with. I've never been great at socializing so this is helping me and I love having people over whom I invited to my home. It makes my home feel more like my home MY home too.
10 comments:
That fish looks perfect. Beautiful presentation. I am in awe. And you like spinach!!!! This was a great post. Very thoughtful. I think having the dinners so that people will get to know you better and to make more friends is a wonderful reason to have them. As for having seconds on dessert, can't you just wait until everyone has left to have seconds? Skinny girls probably don't want more, but maybe the guys are just being polite and would have more if you did. I don't know, that's a touchy one.
Boy, I thought of a lot of comments while reading this, so hopefully I'll remember them all. That fish does look delish (and I love cilantro!). I think you do an excellent job on the dinners (and don't feel the need to say thank-you...and I'm sure everyone is nodding in agreement).
Definitely ask people to bring something when they offer. Maybe ask them what they would like to bring. That takes the pressure off you figuring out what they would be comfortable with.
Also, I thought the last dinner I came to went wonderfully well. I didn't think you seemed stressed out about the food not being finished yet. It all just seemed very natural. Gave us time to talk and meet one another prior to eating.
I also think that if someone is not on time (or there when the food is finished) you should start without them. I felt horribly that I was late the first time, but I was glad you had already started and that I hadn't forced everyone to wait for me (of course I did give the courtesy call you were talking about).
Well, I think I hit all the points I wanted to. Do you think this comment is long enough?
I just still think it's so great that you do this. No wonder they give you compliments and thank you so much.
The fish looks wonderful. I love fish.
With regard to having people bring something, it depends. If you don't want them to just go pick up a bag of chips at the store, then make sure they're the type of person that would actually make something. But if you feel comfortable having them bring something, then do let them. I think that if you're unsure, you can always tell them to bring drinks!
That fish really did look delish. The art of entertaining...and I really do believe it is an art comes with practice and stride and BRAVERY to actually take the plunge and host an event. YOU are doing a great job, the conversation is as much you as your guests and I would always graciously accept an offer of someone bringing something if in fact it will help you. There are some meals where it is fun to do the whole thing from A-Z and other meals where it is fun to do A, the entree'. I hope I get drawn again and I would love to bring a fabulous 3 layered cake on a ruffled cake stand :) (if I get an offer :)
One other thing that I have loved when going to others homes, is a loaf of french bread casually placed on the table with or without a basket to be pulled apart. There's something so authentic about this and anyone can bring a loaf of bread :)
I have thought that I need to add bread to my dinners. Good tip. I want to draw you again too. I know you always make great conversation.
That looks yummy. And good for you for bringing back the fine art of entertaining.
As for your dilemma. You could always offer them a choice. You can give them a way out (although most people don't offer unless they mean it) and then when you're sure they meant it you could ask if they'd rather bring a salad or a dessert. Or something.
I tend to be gushy with my complements, but I'm always sincere. That plate of salmon on top of the pasta is beautifully presented with the green of the cilantro and the yellow lemon slices. Truly a work of art.
I think what you are doing is brave. It takes guts to cook new things and to invite people over. I understand your stress, but think that with practice things will get a bit easier. I love your word: fantabulousness. In my mind, that is a perfect description of your drawing dinners.
One thing that you can ask someone who may be a bit more unreliable to bring is a beverage, that way if they fail to follow through it isn't a huge deal.
I always want seconds of dessert. I'm totally with you there.
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